Everything I thought I knew about life, love, and myself changed the instant my firstborn child was placed in my arms. Motherhood became my life’s work and my children my greatest treasures. Each came bearing gifts that far outweigh anything I could ever give them. They continue to make me strive every day to be better than I am. I have no idea how to measure the love or express the gratitude I feel for having had the privilege of being their mother. They are my everything. Meet my universe.
Firstborn. He arrived in the usual way in 1994 and made my purpose clear. He is funny, witty, enthusiastic, sensitive, and expressive with a bit of artist’s anguish. In another life, I believe he was poet. He has natural musical abilities playing both drums and self taught guitar, a syrupy smooth voice and an easy athleticism. He is a free spirit who has always marched to the beat of his own drum with little regard for others opinions of him. He taught me more about love in his first days here than I knew in a lifetime before him. He will always be the keeper of my heart.
Sailor Boy. He barreled into the world at 11 pounds in 1995 and has a mental strength to match his size. He has always been independent, deep, and mature. He is focused and self possessed, hysterically funny, overwhelmingly charming but sometimes stingingly direct. On many occasions, he has called me out forcing me to examine my own motives. He can at once fill me with pride and anguish as I know he doesn’t need me so much. He is now serving as a missile technician in the US Navy. He is a born leader, a man of honor, and my child who keeps me humble.
Thirdborn or Mathwiz, he was my first child born at home in 1997 and I swear he arrived smiling. We used to joke that he could watch the house crumble to the ground and then admire the rubble. He is always positive and loved by all he encounters. He is also amazingly brilliant with a love of math. From the time he was very small he would follow me around with his math book begging for more lessons. He insisted that I teach him to read when he was four. He is my social butterfly who never fails to express his love for me before he heads out the door. He is graduating a year early in May 2015 with plans to study aerospace engineering. He is my easiest child who always helps me find joy and a bright light in this world.
Big Sister or Blondie. Also born at home in 1999, She is my mini me. She is a gifted performer with a heart as big as Texas. She has high hopes, big dreams, deep thoughts, and a splash of sass. She undertakes everything with great passion and has no patience for injustice. She is a homeschooled freshman and my only child who has never been to public school. She and I share the same sense of humor and joy of juvenile pranks which is rarely appreciated by the men in our lives. Our time together is full of belly laughs, deep conversations, and mutual empowerment. She is considering a career in midwifery and identifies herself as a feminist. She is the child who most validates me–we just “get” each other.
Little Sister, joined the family in the summer of 2012 and we finalized her adoption in December of that year when she was six years old. She spent four years in foster care being bounced through 10 placements before landing with us and has an alphabet soup of diagnoses and resulting learning and behavioral challenges to show for it. (RAD, PTSD, FAS, & ADHD). Despite her challenges, she is friendly, eager to please, and forgiving. She loves crafts, drawing, singing, dancing, and all things sparkly. Our journey together has been difficult. She is the child who has taught me the most about patience, perseverance and acceptance.
Little Guy, joined the family in February of 2013 and we finalized his adoption in May of 2014 two weeks before his sixth birthday. He is bright, insightful, sensitive, kind and man oh man is he funny. His one liners fill our days with laughter. His attachment to the family was quick and easy and I often forget that he was adopted. His rough start has left him with self regulation and sensory challenges, but he is working hard and becoming more the master of himself every day. He is my most resilient child and the one who protects my faith in the power of love. My only child to enter the world after my 40th birthday, he also keeps me young at heart.